Tuesday, November 27, 2012

More Adventures in Awesomeness!!

News! News! News! 

It's never a boring time with me.  There is always something crazy happening in my life.  Besides stuffing myself like a Turkey Dinner this holiday, I also did something a little insane.

What could it be??? you ask....

Let's take some questions from the audience...
  • Did you win the lottery?  sadly no, but I feel like I did.
  • Did you get your braces off?  - I WISH.  My news isn't that cool, but on that note, they will come off in DECEMBER! Santa is delivering my Christmas wish a little early.
  • Did you finally get that gum out of the carpet?  Nope, but better than that - I REPLACED IT!
Have you given up yet??  No???
  • Did medical science decide to freeze my embryos for future generations to bask in the presence of awesome me?  Umm... no, but that would be cool.  And on that other note, no I'm not pregnant, but thank you for thinking that I could.
  • Did you get your midnight tickets for THE HOBBIT?  OF COURSE!! And my shirts are hot and ready to feel the magic, but that's not it, though it's cool too.
Oh.... did you give up? Fine, I will tell you.

I decided to try and get my book published and guess what?  It worked.  I am now a contracted author with Xchyler Pubishing. (it's pronounced Skyler, for those of you who are thinking about some crazy baby name spellings).  I'm just getting started, but they are super excited to have me with them.

Next you'll see my very own theme park in Florida.  Cool huh?

If you have read my story and know the genre, just take a look at the website and you'll know my book is a perfect fit. http://xchylerpublishing.com/

Wish me luck!!!

Monday, November 12, 2012

Sitting With Dinosaurs

So called "Cute" party people.
I thought it would be an amazing idea to take my daughter for her ninth birthday to our bland new Natural History Museum.  This was a very appealing idea to my nerdy daughter and also my equally nerdy geologist husband.  We took a few of her friends, most of them very cute and not as nerdy, to this amazing museum.

The museum is designed in a rather tricky fashion - if you take the elevator to the top you can walk down the exhibits and see about EVERYTHING!



Watching all the heathen children scamper about in all the kid-friendly exhibits was fun and exhausting, but mostly fun.  Finally when you are walking down to the bottom floor you reach THE DINOSAURS!
Please note the tall Dinosaur at the end of the picture that stretches its neck high to the ceiling, "The Apatosaurus."


As we reached near the bottom I was rather distracted by a glass floor showing the excavation site of the Cleveland-Lloyd Dinosaur Quarry.  
My sister minutes before the incident.  Notice the large leg in the back?
As I looked closely at the floor I lost my footing and stumbled backward.  If you notice the tall railing in the back, my hand grabbed it thinking I had a sure post behind me - however, what I had was a small tripping fence that I fell flatly over INTO THE EXHIBIT!  I was sitting bottoms down inbetween the Allosaurus and the gigantic Apatosaurus.  I looked over just to see the tall monster swaying by my human intrution.
I added this picture of"Breaking Dancing Alexa" as an illustration of the floor, the railing and the small fencing holding in the dinosaurs.


And then it dawned on me... I need to get out of here!  If this dinosaur topples I AM GOING TO BE ON THE NEWS!  This was trouble. 

I look over, no one else in the entire group saw me fall.  A few of the girls saw me.  "What are you doing in there?" one asked.  Good question.  I quickly tried to slide out undetected, but it was not as easy as falling in.  The dinosaurs were still moving and I thought every vibration might create the great extinction of the dinosaurs, from the NHMU.  But without help, I managed to get out of there without much humiliation from the others. I only had the long bruise across my butt to prove my personal assault on the extinction of the fossil giants - which I will NOT post on this blog... but trust me, it's there.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Halloween Speaks

I thought tonight I would sit down and read a "SPOOKY" Halloween story with my two girls, since Halloween is only a week away and it has been so gloomy and autumn-ish.  What did we read?

The Spider and the Fly
Awesome Tony DiTerlizzi's interpretation of the classic poem.
http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/601598.The_Spider_and_the_Fly

At the end of the poem, on the very last page is a letter written by the spider, since we know what happened to the fly.

The last phrase says this, "Take what has transpired within these pages to heart, or you might well find yourself trapped in some schemer's web."

Mia stops, looks all excited and re-reads this line.

Mia: "Mom, that's an Idiom."

Me: "What?"  (she is eight after all)  "What do you know about idioms?"

Mia: "It means that you should watch out or someone will take you."

Me: (stumped)  "A lot of adults don't know much about idioms.  When did you learn about idioms?"

Mia:  "Hello Mom... Second Grade..."

Me: "Well of course."

Mia:  ".....and Martha Speaks."

I knew PBS would educate my children.  Hooray for IDIOMS and MARTHA SPEAKS!
Thank you PBS!

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Storytime with Daddy

It was my husband's turn to read to my five year old Jules before she went to bed.  I listened from the living room as I typed on my laptop.  This is what I heard.

Jules: Let me pick out the book, Daddy.

Daddy: What? Barbie, A Fairy Secret?  Where did we get this crap?

Jules: Please Daddy? (very charming)

Daddy:  *sigh*  "It was the opening night of a new movie starring Barbie and Raquelle. Raquelle was the first to arrive at the theater. 'Raquelle, we're so thrilled you could make it!' gushed the reporter. Suddenly, Barbie and Ken walked down the red carpet..."  Really?  This is lame.  Did you mom buy this?

Jules: Come on Daddy. Read it.

Daddy: "Furious that her spotlight was stolen, a jealous Raquelle stepped on Barbie's dress."

     I could hear the disgust rising in his voice, but he kept reading.

Daddy: "Barbie's stylists,"... Stylists? "Carrie and Taylor, rushed to the rescue.  Barbie didn't know it, but the two girls were really fairies from a secret world called... Gloss Angeles????"

Jules: Ummm.... Maybe I should pick another book.


Tuesday, October 9, 2012

A Lesson in Fashion

I am full of excuses...

My first, that I attended girl's camp for a week and left my very patient husband with my two girls for the week, in which he went and bought clothes for them, because not enough were packed - my fault.  He picked what he thought were very fine matching outfits, but that I later discovered - something that I have never told him - that he bought my eight yr old pajamas without knowing it.

Second, that since the school year I started working very early in the morning and don't have the opportunity to get my two girls off to school.  This leaves my once again, very patient husband, the opportunity to get them dressed and do their hair on his own.  I have tried to be thoughtful and get everything ready for them, so he will not need to pick out any clothes or worry about matching socks - I will take care of all.

Which leads to number three - sometimes I am run late - and who could blame me at such an hour.  My five yr old I usually have nothing to worry about.  Jules is fashionable and matchy, though a little flashy for a Kindergartener.  She likes to dress up in sparkly do-dads and, thank heavens, she brushes her hair.  No severe cause for alarm.

Eight yr old Mia is a completely different character.

The other day she did something I feared - she wore the previously mentioned pajamas to school.  She told me when I picked her up,

Mia: "You know what, Mom?  I think you are right.  I think these are pajamas."
Me: "And why do you think that?"
Mia: "Someone in my class has the same pajamas.  She told me."

I'm mortified, but she has such charisma that this didn't bother her in the slightest.  I actually think that she likes being the odd one in class.

This morning was another such morning for me; flitting out of the house in the wee hours without a thought to what my daughters would wear, remembering near lunchtime that I had not set out their clothes and wondered how my husband ended his morning.

When I picked up my Jules from Kindergarten she looked great - picking out her fashionable "Jeggings" and her favorite bright animal shirt.  Mia, however, when I saw her I started to laugh.  She had dressed herself in blue and gray plaid shorts, a red and orange and yellow tie-dyed shirt with japanese character writing on it and a big monkey of the front, a shirt she grabbed from my closet I might add, and that hung around too big for her little shoulders, a baseball cap she had stuffed her hair in, creating a large ball of tangles, and very obvious mismatched socks - one long florescent polka-dotted sock and one small striped ankle sock.

I asked her:
Me: "Where was you dad this morning?  He let you wear this to school?"
Mia: "He doesn't care what I wear, Mom, just that I'm dressed."

I thought about what she was wearing:
Me: "I don't mind that you want to be different--"
Mia: "I don't like matching Mom."
Me: "I understand.  But I think there needs to be a limit.  Maybe just one thing at a time. You ook just like Junie B. Jones."
Mia: (all excited) "I know!  Cool huh?"

She didn't say much to me about it until later when she came up and said,

Mia: "I want to break a record."
Me: "What do you mean?"
She looks at her socks...
Mia: "I want to keep my socks on for a week."
Me: "Mia, that's gross."
Mia: "Well, I'll change them up, like I will put this sock on the other foot, so people don't know, they will think I am wearing the match or something."
Me: "Well, can I at least wash them during the week?"
Mia: "No, Mom, that ruins the record."

So, I have learned my lesson:
  1. I must deal with the fact that my daughter wants to personify any title character created by Judy Bloom or Barbara Park.
  2. I will need to wake up earlier in the morning and make sure that my girls have clothes and socks that MATCH.
  3. And I will educate my very patient husband, the good man that he is, that outfits for girls, even one with cute cupcakes on them, are not made by JOE BOXER.
Photobucket